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The Pie Hole: Stacking Panda Bread.

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What’s cuter than a panda? Fucking panda bread, bitch! We haven’t tried this recipe yet but we’re hoping that it’s just as delicious as it is adorable.


• 3 cups Gold Medal unbleached all-purpose flour
• 2 1/2 tbsp sugar
• 1 cup milk w/ 1 egg yolk (both should total 1 cup together)
• 3/4 tbsp salt
• 1 1/2 tbsp unsalted butter, softened
• 1 tbsp green tea (matcha) powder mixed w/ 2 tsp hot water, OR green food coloring
• 3 1/2 tsp cocoa powder mixed w/ 1 1/2 tsp hot water
• 2 1/4 tsp active dry yeast

On the Clock.↓

Prep Time: 2hrs 30mins ↔ Total Time: 3hrs

Courtesy of Taste of Adventure.

Courtesy of Taste of Adventure.

Courtesy of Taste of Adventure.

Courtesy of Taste of Adventure.


In a small bowl, microwave milk and egg yolk for about 30 seconds. Set aside.

In the bowl of a stand mixer, combine flour, sugar and yeast.

Add in butter, salt and milk mixture, stirring on low speed with the dough hook attachment.

Increase speed to medium and knead until dough comes together and pulls away from the sides, about 5-10 minutes. If the dough is sticky, add a tbsp-ful of dough at a time until it is smooth and elastic.

Divide dough into three pieces, two about equal and one about 1/3 the size of the other two.

Place one of the large pieces in the stand mixer bowl and mix with green tea/water mixture OR green tea food coloring until desired color is reached.

Remove dough from bowl and place in a lightly greased bowl, covered, to rise until doubled.

Clean stand mixer bowl, then place smallest piece of dough in stand mixer and combine with cocoa powder/water mixture until color is blended through. Remove dough from bowl and place in a separate, lightly greased bowl, covered, to rise until doubled.

Place plain piece of dough in a separate, lightly greased bowl, covered, to rise until doubled. All pieces should double in about an hour.

Once dough is risen, on a floured surface, divide plain dough in thirds, with one piece being half the size of the other two (as you did before). Use one of the larger pieces to form the face. Divide the cocoa dough in quarters and use two quarters to form the eyes.

Quickly place the smallest piece of plain dough between the eyes to keep them in place. Stretch remaining piece of plain dough over the whole bread to lock everything in place.

Take last two quarters of cocoa dough and form the ears.

Divide green dough in two pieces, one twice the size of the other. Take the small piece to fill in the space between the ears. Take the larger piece of green dough and stretch over the whole bread to lock everything in place.

Place dough in a lightly greased loaf pan, cover and let rise until doubled, about 1 hour.

Meanwhile, preheat oven to 375 degrees F.

Once dough is risen, bake for about 30 minutes or until golden brown on the outside (the inside should register 190 degrees F). Allow to cool completely on a cooling rack before slicing or serving.

About The Quiet Lunch.

The Quiet Lunch.
Quiet Lunch is a grassroot online publication that seeks to promote various aspects of life and culture with a loving, but brute, educational tinge. When we say, “Cerebral Sustenance Daily,” we mean it.

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